The fact that I’m not dating right now, or even thinking about dating in the near future, has given me some space to think that I have needed for a very long time. It’s given me room to consider some important things about myself, about what is important to me, and about what I would want in a partner. Several times I have thought about making a list of the qualities I’m looking for in this hypothetical person. But I never seem to be able to actually create the list. I wonder if it’s because I’m just not ready for him yet?

In the meantime, here’s the biggest item on my list. The one item that gives me inspiration and hope, and that I dream about in the only kind of relationship I would consider settling into for the remainder of my life:

A solid and true best-friendship.

I dream of having a true partner someday. In my dream, we honestly enjoy each others’ company. We laugh together a lot (as we find each other hilarious). We talk about everything that there is to talk about – family, religion, politics and the gossip column. But also we sit next to each other, legs or feet touching, drinking our morning coffee in comfortable silence.

I’m not under any delusions about perfection. But I dream of being with someone who I enjoy and respect and feels the same way about me – and the rest seems like it could be manageable.

Inspired by this post on love after marriage